When things go wrong,when sadness fills ur heart,when tears flow in ur eyes,Always remember three things
1)Am with you
2)U have money
3)Bar is open
one elephant and two ants was fighting.one ant is thrown away by the elephant
and the other ant sits on top of the elephant.what did the wounded ant say?
aliya chavitti kollada avane
When u find love treasure it,take care of it,be true to it,make good use of it,coz love comes unseen.u can only see it when its gone…
A sparrow was in love with a white rose.One fine day this sparrow proposed the white rosre.The white rose told when she turns red she’ll love him.Sparrow tares his body and slowly spreads his blood in the white rose and it turns red and fell in love but the sparrow is no more.This is love…
What happened to ur network i tried to call u,but the operator said ‘welcome to jungle,the monkey u r trying to call is on the tree plz try after sometime’.
Smoke everyday.It means
.So smoke everyday…
Request :be a chain smoker.
My eyes r full of uncontrollable tearsbcoz u r far away frm me.I wish if u were near me today to cut these onions instead of me.
True friends r like diamonds…They r real & rare.False frnds r like leaves…They r scattered everywhere.some times it will be a painful journey finding them.
A doctor can save my life
A lawer can defend my life
A sodier can giv me a peaceful life
but only a friend like u can give me ur wife.
Mr.inside went to see Mr.outside.Inside standing outside called outside outside.but outside sitting inside callled inside inside.when inside came inside outside went outside to see inside.then outside called inside outside.but inside from inside called outside inside.now where is ur brain?inside or outside???
If u r not sleeping read this message.otherwise just sleep.I just had a doubtif u r still sleeping bcoz u seem to be sleeping now.so if u still want to sleep i want to tell u that if u still want sleep just sleep.hope i have not disturbed u when u were sleeping and sorry for disturbing u while u where sleeping.Gnight
Do u remember the day we travelled in a car? I put my dog out of the window and u put ur face out ,then people satrt shouting “TWINS TWINS”
Troubles as light as air; love as deep as ocean; friends as solid as diamond; success as bright as gold; these are my wishes for u on this SEASON.
GIRLS POLICY: Fraud with innicent boys! Fun with handsome boys! Friendship with smart boys! Love with faithful boys! Marriage with rich boys! So be careful!!!
Husband and wife are like two tyres of bajaj scooter.If one punctures,the vehicle wont move further.Intelligent men always carry a stepny with them.
WOMAN has ‘MAN’ in it.MRS has ‘MR’ in it.FEMALE has ‘MALE’ in it.SHE has ‘HE’ in it.MADAM has ‘ADAM’ in it.No wonder “MEN” always want to be inside.
Every company is like a tree full of monkeys.Those at the top can only see monkeys below tehm & those at the bottom can see only assholes above them.
A special program to update the brain.Enter ur name and press update
ERROR.No BRAIN found.Thank you for using this program
If a smile could be a raindrop i would wish that it keeps raining throughout ur life so that there may be no place for tears in ur life.
Hey why are u so angry with me? What made u so angry? Why are u not messaging me? What was my mistake? Afetrall what did i do? I accidentally stepped on ur TAIL thats all…
If that is too much for u here is a shortcut…Just think of ME.
As I wathced the ants crawl up the wall i noticed that no matter how busy they are,they still stop & communicate with another. Hope we can be like them in touch for ever.
Sincere apology:if u dont like any of me SMS & dont like to read or if my msg disturb u,then please dont hesitate,feel free to………Throw ur mobile away…
Nobody can stop me.I’ll send u SMS till my death ? NO!Ur death,NO! World ends ? NO! Oxygen available ? NO Truly speaking till SMS is free for me…
YOU are someone i dont want to lose…
YOU are someone i wont forget…
YOU are someone who is special to me…
YOU are WHATS UR NAME I FORGOT ? :0)
Who said ENglish is easy,fill this blank with YES or NO…
1.___I dont have a brain.
2.___I dont have sense.
3.___I am stupid.
Friendship is like wine…as it gets older it gets more sweeter…just like u n me…u r getting older and am getting sweeter…
Look at the sky & see gods glory.look at teh moon & see gods wonder.look at the mirror & see gods BLUNDER…
Friends are like fishes…u hav to sit patiently for a long time to catch a nice one…just like i caught u…better stay nice or i’ll fry u…
What is common between KRISHNA,RAM,GHANDI,BUDHA & JESUS ? sardar replied…all are born on government holidays!!!
In a survey it was asked in how many days a 1000 page book can be read.
Engineer-on the night bfore exam
Last nite I lay in bed, looking at the stars, the beautiful sky and the endless horizon…. and suddenly I thought… where the hell is my roof?
You are like the sunshine so warm,****you are like sugar, so sweet…****you are like you…****and that’s the reason why I love you!
Latest in college:Twinkle twinkle little star,Just I went to media bar,Quarter rate is up so high,I drank a beer with chicken fry…
Sardar breaks an egg to make omlette but notices that the egg is empty.Sardar says”saala!now a days even hens have started using condoms!!”
This is to formally announce that i have started christmas gifts in CASH CHEQUES & CHOCOLATES etc.Avoid last day rush,send them now…
Girl friends are like net virus:
They enter ur life,scan ur pockets,edit ur mind,download problems & delete ur happiness.
Recent survey has shown taht 85% of Btech students are infected by AIDS.Shocked AIDS-Attendance& Internals Deficiency Syndrome.
GIRL-Ghost In Real Life.
So avoid them and forward their numbers to me.
Written on the tshirt of a girl:
Statuatory warning:Objects inside the tshirt are larger than tehy appear from outside!!!
Two men at a bar struck up a converstaion.One of them said,u think only u have family problems,listen to my situation.A few years ago i met a young widow with a daughter.We got married.Later my father married my step-daughter.That made my step-daughter my step-mother and my father became my step-son.Also my wife became mother-in-law of her father-in-law.Then the daughter of my wife ie my step-mother had a son.So i am my own grandpa,confused!!!
Theory is when u know something but it doesent work.Practise is when something works but u dont know why.Engineers combine thery & practise.Nothing works & they dont know why.
A little boy asked a pregnant lady pointing to her stomach whats that.
lady:thats my sweet baby.i lov him very much.
Kid:then why the hell did u eat him.
Do you know what is “anatomized juxtaposition of two orbicularis oris muscles in a state of contratcion”,it is the biochemical definition of a kiss.
How indian professors speak english.Dont dare talk infront of my back.Both of you three stand together seperately.why are you so latee,say yes or no.take 5cm wire of any length.i have two daughters,both of them are girls.all of you stand in a atraight circle.quiet..the principal just passed away.
Woman life is very hard.Morning wash clothes,noon dry clothes,evening iron clothes,at night remove clothes,midnight searching for clothes.
Mom to her sexy daughter:Tell me the name of that bastard who made you pregnant.
Girl:Hey mom after eating a dozen of bananas can u tell which pne made you fat.
There are some of teh romantic countries in the world.
HOLLAND-Hope Our Love Lasts And Never Dies
ITALY-I Trust And Love YOU
LIBYA_Love Is Beautiful and You Also
and this is my favourite
FRANCE_Friendships Remain And Never Comes to an End.
Newtons law of Romance:-Love can neither be created nor be destroyed,it can only be changed from one girl friend to another with some loss of money…
Thalle ninakkipolum sukham thannalledey.Ipo entharu ninte mofile kadali veenodey msg onnum kananillalla.Thalle nee pulithanne ketta.chellakilli sugam thanne…
Bush asks God:When will Iraq be mine?
God:Not in ur life time.bush cries.
Mushraf asks God:When will Kashmir be in Pakistan?
God:Not in ur life time.mushraf cries.
And i asked God:When will this reader get brain?
This time God cries,and says:Not in my life time.
Ten commandments for engineering students
1.study only during study holidays.
2.shall treat all marks above 40 as bonus marks.
3.shall write all assignments only on the morning of submission.
4.spend as much money as possible.
5.70% attendance in canteen and theatre only.
7.be an outstanding student.
9.if thou cant convince them confuse them.
10.start every sentence with aliya…
Sardar standing on balcony without shirt.neighbour said”what a nice chest”,sardar said “oye this is nothing come to my room and see my wife’s…
Ocean full of syllabus,river full of questions,bucketfull we study,mug level we write,marks come in drops.Thats is engineering.
If fate favours you one day and u r asked wha u wanna be,dont wish to be someone else,coz u r wonderful the way u are…